1. I Don’t Have An Attitude Problem I Just Have A Personality You Can’t Handle
2. Stop Checking My Status ! Go Get A Life
3. The Only Thing That Ruins My Day Is Taking A Big Crap After A Shower.
4. A Boss Is Like A Diaper… Always On Your Ass, And Usually Full Of Shi***T
5. If I Had A Pound For Every Time I Got Suspicious… I’d Wonder Who The F&*K Was Paying Me, And Why?
6. Just Wanted To Say, You Are As Useless As “ueue” In A “queue”
7. Ever Read A Book That Changed Your Life? Me Neither.
8. Getting Married Is A Lot Like Getting Into A Tub Of Hot Water. After You Get Used To It, It Ain’t So Hot.
9. I M Not Special, I Am Just A Limited Edition.
10. Fun Is Like Life Insurance.The Older You Get..The More It Cost’s.
11. When A Girl Says She’ll Be Ready In 5 More Minutes, It’s The Same As When A Guy Says The Game Has 5 Minutes Left.
12. I Come Up With The Best Ideas When Sitting On The Toilet Then Forget Them After The Flush.
13. Hey Mate…you There…whatsapp Is Using Me.
14. Why Is Monday So Far From Friday And Friday So Near To Monday????
15. There Is Only 1 Thing 2 Do, 3 Words For You – I Love You
16. Etc.= End Of Thinking Capacity.
17. Only Marriage Is The Major Cause Of Divorce.
18. If You Are Player Then I’m The Game.
19. Awesome Ends With Me And Ugly Starts With You.
20. You Can Disturb Me….I’m Available.
21. Some People Call Me Mike, You Can Call Me Tonight.
22. Scratch Here ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ To Reveal This Status.
23. Do You Want To Go Out With Me? (A) Yes (B) A (C) B.
24. My Week Is Basically …monday–>Monday#2–>Monday#3–>Monday#4–>Friday–>Saturday–>Premonday
25. Every Problem Comes With A Solution. If It Doesn’t Have Any Solution, It’s A…………. Girl
26. Insult And Wife Are Somewhat Similar….They Always Look Good…if It Is Not Yours.
27. I’m Jealous Of My Parents… I’ll Never Have A Kid As Cool As Theirs!
28. I Wish I Had Google In My Mind And Antivirus In My Heart.
29. I Speak My Mind. I Never Mind What I Speak.
30. Love Your Girl Like You Love Your Coffee… Enjoy It Before Its Hotness Goes.
31. Life Is Too Short. Don’t Waste It Reading My Watsapp Status….
32. Behind This Smile Is Everything You’ll Never Understand.
33. We All Feel A Little F**D Up Sometimes
34. If I’m Wired With You. I Like You.
35. I Love Buying New Things But I Hate Spending Money.
36. Stop Waiting For One Day. Today Is The Day Bangbang
37. I Hate Math But I Love Counting Money.
38. I Believe In Hate At First Sight.
39. There’s Always A Person That You Hate For No Reason.
40. If I Get Jealous Then Yes I Really Like You.
41. The Earth Without Art Is Just Eh.
42. We All Are Born To Die Don’t Feel More Special Than Me.
43. I’m Not Arguing, I’m Simply Tried To Explaining Why I’m Right.
44. Laziness Is Me Middle Name.
45. I Wonder If I’ve Met The Person I’m Going To Marry.
46. Math Rule: If It Seems Easy, You’re Doing It Wrong.
47. I Need Google In My Brain.
48. You Have Eyes My Dear But You Cannot See.
49. I’m Not Weird, I’m Limited Edition.
50. The Problem Is Not The Problem; The Problem Is Your Attitude About The Problem.
51. If You Fall. I’ll Be There.
52. Do Your Legs Hurt From Running Through My Dreams All Night?
53. The Best Way To Create Your Future Is To Create It.
54. Sleep All Your Troubles Away.
55. I’m Not Bossy. I Just Know What You Should Be Doing.
56. Someone Else Is Happy With Less Than What You Have.
57. May Your Problems Be As Few And As Far Apart As My Gma’s Teeth.
58. The Ones Who Say “you Can’t” And “you Won’t” Are Probably The Ones Scared That “you Will”.
59. We Must All Make The Choice Between What Is Right And What Is Easy.
60. One Day You Will Wake Up And There Won’t Be Any More Time To Do The Things You’ve
Always Wanted. Do It Now
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